When Christians and "church people" begin to view and confront sin the way we would a child who has gone astray, then maybe people will be able to hear us because we won't sound like a bunch of arrogant hotheads.
My son is only 3 so I know that I haven't been through the trials many parents have faced. But I also don't believe that if he comes home after a night of drinking, getting busted for drugs, with a pregnant girlfriend, or some other stupid, bonehead mistake that I'll stop loving him.
Yes I will be angry, upset, hurt, and pretty ticked off. But he will be able to sense the love that I still have (and the anger). I will do my best to communicate my love and concern for his well-being but also my disdain for the sin that he has committed. I'm not saying that we tolerate this continued behavior either, I'm talking his first big screw-up. A continued breach of trust and ignoring instruction is a whole other story.
I know it's easier said than done, but that is the kind of love, the kind of compassion, the kind of passion, the kind of instruction and care that it will take to get children, friends, or strangers to turn away from a life of sin. Someone we care about either has been or is likely in one of these categories: sexually immoral, idolater, adulterer, homosexual, thief, greedy, drunkard, reviler, or swindler (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).
We can't just scream and yell sin away, it has to be removed by love and confession. If we confess our sins, God is faithful to forgive us (1 John 1:9). If our children admit their mistakes, we forgive them and continue to love them. Why can't we allow others that same grace and compassion for their past transgressions? Hasn't God shown us grace and mercy for ours? I believe this is the closest we can come to truly loving the sinner and hating the sin.
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